nakia
New Member
Posts: 31
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Post by nakia on May 17, 2007 23:49:48 GMT -5
Here is a Poem!! i hope you like it!!
The Simple things
Play me the ocean on your violin
Sing me the sunset time and time again
Tell me a story of an old oak tree
Whisper me a hurricane coming from the sea
Paint me the silence of a winters morning mist
Tell me all the things the wind cannot resist
Show me all the simple things
The things that no one sees
Tell me of a tidal wave
Or of tiny honey bees
Write me a poem about a fire’s deepest fears
Dance for me the river’s silent crystal tears
Show me all the flowers that bloom in early spring
Enlighten me about all the very simple things
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Post by aiedail on May 18, 2007 0:34:25 GMT -5
WOW!!! I like it coco boie!!!!! it's awesome!!!
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nakia
New Member
Posts: 31
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Post by nakia on May 18, 2007 10:39:28 GMT -5
Thanks Hannah!
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Iornor
Experienced Member
Posts: 176
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Post by Iornor on May 18, 2007 12:39:26 GMT -5
I loved it! very good!
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nakia
New Member
Posts: 31
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Post by nakia on May 18, 2007 13:26:57 GMT -5
Thanks Dom! I think it needs some work!  but i dont know what |
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Post by NightStarFairy on May 18, 2007 17:51:13 GMT -5
Love it!!!!!
Good job!
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Post by The Deecho on May 19, 2007 23:21:28 GMT -5
Another brilliant poet!!! That was awesome, I think I'm in love.  |
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nakia
New Member
Posts: 31
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Post by nakia on May 20, 2007 10:17:31 GMT -5
Thanks Laura and Caroline, and I'm not brilliant yet! lol
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Post by aiedail on May 20, 2007 23:00:18 GMT -5
brilliant yet? i'm not sure what you mean. but your poem is awesome, like i already said. heeh
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Post by SkinnyGreenMan on May 21, 2007 0:00:24 GMT -5
Wow, good job chloe. I hadn't ventured into the poems threads before, but now I'm glad I did.
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nakia
New Member
Posts: 31
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Post by nakia on May 21, 2007 17:20:17 GMT -5
Sorry Hannah!! i meant ''not brilliant yet'' lol!!
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Post by Happy Camper on May 21, 2007 21:00:55 GMT -5
explain your posts better, not just "I like this".
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Post by Mimori on May 24, 2007 17:26:55 GMT -5
Very nice, kind of soothing and relaxing with all the imagery you have in it. Including the topic, simple things are really some of the best things in life. Good job on this sweetie, it’s wonderfully written!
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nakia
New Member
Posts: 31
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Post by nakia on May 24, 2007 17:29:22 GMT -5
Thanks Mimori! I'm Glad you liked it! did you want me to explain my post better Josh? or where you talking to someone else ( maybe you should explain that better  ) If you were talking to me i will try to explain better! |
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Post by Mimori on May 24, 2007 17:43:47 GMT -5
What I got from the rules of posting here, was just add a bit more critique to the comment (s)…So I think I did it right! Haha, but yeah, I don’t think he was talking about you
Hehe, and no worries, the poem was great.
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) If you were talking to me i will try to explain better!